Oblige me by not Actually Reading This Rant.

I think, in fancy-psychology-people terms, there should be a word for teenage-girl-specific bipolarity. Over the weekend and today, I've barely been able to spend an hour within the same mood. I started sending the anonymous llama online to calm myself down after a fight with Lauren, and that helped, but tonight I'm just... Argh.



I need a break from humanity. Humanity needs a break from me and my teenage angsty shit and moodswings.

Basically Lauren and I had a hypocritical bitchfest Saturday, and yesterday I spent not associating with humanity because of it, and noooow it's not better. Well, we're not yelling at each other right now or anything like that, it's just... Humanity argharghargh.

Ali received a flower which may possibly have from Simon earlier, and when I told my mother that, she started going through hypothetical scenarios in which he asks her out. I. Don't want. To fucking deal with that. I WILL, if it happens, but I really don't want to. At all. And I tooooold my mother "hey, I don't wanna talk about it 'cause it's exponentially awkward," but SHE CAN'T TAKE THE DAMN POINT. I also had to explain that there's some sort of vagina code somewhere stating that you don't date your best friend's ex. If Simon asks her out, I reserve all my rights to ask out Fox naaaah I wouldn't do that. That wouldn't go down well, even if he is single now.

So now my vocal chords hate me and I kinda wanna cry. I hate him. I hate him I hate him I hate him I hate him I want him to stop fucking feeding off everything in my life. I don't care if it's unintentional; I want him to go fall in some FUCKING HOLE somewhere. He's pretty much refused to acknowledge my existence for the last several months (and he can't NOT know that I hate that), yet spends his time with so many of the same people I do. I feel like I can't spend time anywhere (especially with Ali, and that makes me feel horrible) without him there, and it's just awkward. I don't care if it's only so in my head. It makes me feel like absolute shit.

Soooo yay ranting! I need to go read a book. And do homework that'll just give me more brainspace to angst and rant about everything in my head until I give in and call Seth and be all "CONSOLE MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEH." Then it turns into a heated debate about the necessity of hobbits in the world. Tomorrow's Valentine's Day, too... Awesomesauce... I'm kind of indifferent toward the holiday. I'll just violate Jacob more than usual or something; that's always an uplifting experience!